Checking in!

Checking in!

If you have been following along here for a while, you may have noticed that it’s been quiet around here. This might have been the longest writing hiatus I’ve taken since I started blogging back in 2011 (?). Well, I’ve still been microblogging over at Instagram but I haven’t had the wherewithal to write here in a while.

It’s been a busy, hectic, stressful, anxiety-inducing, joyful, wondrous past few months. Ups, downs, and sideways. I want to try to fill you in on the highlights and lowlights, because I’m all about keeping it real and authentic (gag). 

But if you’re not in for a wordy post here is the tl;dr gist — The kids are good, I’m just okay, but I’m surrounded by support and love.

Now for the meaty bits.

The biggest news is that my anxiety has flared up. It’s been an exceptionally challenging few months. I finally reached out to a mental health provider to start on a plan to get better. I’m still searching for a therapist, but I took the first step in asking for help. Believe me, that was the most challenging part. My husband has been supportive, nurturing, and a true partner in all this. Due to my hectic work schedule and the demands of three small children, I wasn’t finding time for myself to decompress or destress. It finally caught up for me and after a few breakdowns, I said enough was enough. 

It’s still a process obviously and I haven’t found a therapist yet. But there is something cathartic in the initiation, in the beginning, in the relinquishing of my death grip on everything. Knowing and ADMITTING that I am not well and cannot do it on my own has been a first step in management and recovery. I’m no where near “better” (if there is such a thing) but I’ve been doing some things to help. 

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State of the Hive

State of the Hive

In honor of the new year, I thought I would write a family update. I am grateful for our health and for our cozy home on our little island. 2018 was full of big changes, events, and surprises. I know I am looking forward to the year ahead — with all its ups and downs, family, friends, and faith. I present to you the State of the Hive Address

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Henry's first hair cut

Henry's first hair cut

It has been a couple of days since Henry’s first hair cut and I’ve been able to emotionally process this milestone. (Just kidding, I’m still crying.)

I had been meaning to give Henry a hair cut for a while now because, as much as I adore his little curls and flippy ends, he was having trouble seeing. His hair would fall right in front of his eyes and only let me tie his bangs back some of the time. I was debating going to a professional, but alas, I decided that we would all be less traumatized if I did it at home.

I have been cutting Paul’s hair for our entire marriage and while I am by no means an expert, I thought I could figure it out. Now that we’ve washed it and it’s been a couple days, I see a few areas I want to touch up, but overall it’s okay (I think…).

He was a champ throughout the trim and I’d like to give a big shout out to Daniel Tiger and organic lollipops from Trader Joe’s. You’re the real MVP.

Now that he has this little hair trim, he looks all grown up and like a big kid and not a baby and again, I’m crying. He’s also talking a lot more and while I know that has nothing to do with the hair cut, he suddenly seems like such a big boy now.

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Happy Birthday Henry!

Happy Birthday Henry!

Henry turned two today. I cried two bucket-fulls, so right on track.

Our little boy is quite a spitfire. He is the opinionated, passionate, loving, stubborn, snuggly, contemplative, and we just love him oh so much. For his birthday, I brought cupcakes for sharing to his school and we shared a family meal this evening. I am just in awe at this person he is becoming. He is going to be a fantastic big brother. 

I thank God for the gift of his life. 

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Henry at 18 months

Somehow it slipped past my mom brain, but Henry turned 18 months old yesterday. 18 months. EIGHTEEN MONTHS. One and a half. 

This may sound a little basic but, I CAN'T EVEN. 

Henry is a feisty, energetic, and opinionated toddler. He has a scream to pierce eardrums and those slobbery open-mouth kisses that will melt the coldest heart. As of late, he has a few words under his belt including, mama, daddy, ball, waffle, yes, and several other half/almost words that you can somewhat understand from context.

Mostly, he's impressive with his physicality. His hand-eye coordination makes his sports-loving dada shed a single, proud tear. But really, he is already working on ball handling skills. His current loves are shooting hoops in our child-sized bball hoop throwing other balls up into the air and attempting to either catch them or hit himself in the head. He has no preference.

Lately, he's starting to stand up for himself against big sister. This has resulted in several screaming matches between the two of them and can I have a nap now? He is of the mind to waddle over to whatever big sister is doing -- a puzzle, building a tower, playing with her princess castle -- and knock sh** over. I call him my little tornado. 

Category 17. 

He loves to read books which makes my nerdy heart flutter. He often does this imitation thing where he will prop his book up, babble out loud while "reading" the pages, then looking at us before turning the page. I have no idea what he's saying, but oh man, it's wonderful.

Henry is on the fearless side, so we are going to have to watch this one. Where Emma was cautious about hot things, streets, animals, heights, and loud noises, Henry runs head first into danger much to the dismay of his frazzled mama. He'll wander out of the garage and find a rock. in the middle. of the street. Or he'll dive right off the couch. Or attempt to climb into the bath. His petite frame looks all small and cute, but he's a fierce shark under those cubby rolls. 

I'm ready for my second nap.

He does love his big sister and his daddy more than anything. His sister can make him smile mid-tantrum. And he much prefers to cuddle daddy when he's tired or upset. His little legs scamper to wherever Paul is and it is SOPRECIOUSOMG.

On the eating front, let's just say, he's a bottomless pit. Often he'll eat his entire meal, then half of Emma's then some of ours. AT EVERY MEAL. A couple of nights ago we went out to dinner and he demolished two bread baskets then ate his whole meal AND THEN ate half of our cheesecake that we were supposed to share between the four of us. I have to secretly eat my food hiding behind something if I want to eat it alone.

Henry is such a joy. He's a ball of energy. He's loud. He's wonderful. 

Happy half-birthday little boy! 

For a little trip down memory lane, here is his birth story